Love The One You're With
by Annie Tornabene

Relationships are sometimes difficult. Some years ago, I was having difficulty with my first year of marriage. I couldn't understand why my Mom and many other women could stay marriage to the same man for over 50 years. So I conducted a survey to see if I could learn anything from them that could help me. While I'm talking about love relationships, I found these apply to all relationships. Love the one you're with.
The beginning of any relationship is what i call the honeymoon phase. Every thing they do and say, you are in love with. They can do no wrong. This is a great phase where your relationship is on top of the world. Yes, you love the one you're with.
After a while, problems start appearing. Things you never noticed before start bugging you. This can be from problems with his/her family or just their personality. In this phase, true growth of a relationship can happen if you learn to communicate without attacking one another. If you attack each other you will move the relationship into the next phase. If you look at your relationships, you can see the problems with your spouse, children, friends. Learn to communicate without attacking so you can love the one you're with.
The next phase is what I call the illness phase. Here is where you start trying to avoid being with them, bitterness slips in and chaos happens every time you are together. Sound familiar? A lot of work has to go into this phase to pull it out but if caught early it can be saved. If not, the relationship will be plunged into the next stage.
The final stage is called the death phase. You've killed the relationship or just allowed it to die. This is the phase, you want to try to avoid if possible. Sometimes in rare cases, following the death phase, a relationship will bloom again in the honeymoon phase. If it does, learn from your mistakes and love the one you're with. Communication is the key.
Together we can make a difference in understanding depression and learning to live our best life and learning to love the one you're with.